My Testimony!

NOTE: Today in my office at First Baptist Church of Sylacauga, I picked up a copy of the book that God used to change my life. I remember saying that I would spend the rest of my life telling others the TRUTH! This testimony is long, but worth reading because I would not be here today without the life changing truth it contains! Prayerfully! TC

I was born Timothy Wayne Childers on December 18, 1954 at Baptist Memorial Hospital in Gadsden, Alabama. I was born again on August 26, 1982 in Leeds, Alabama. I will never forget the night I sat across the dining room table from my pastor, Alk Kavli. I bowed my head, prayed and accepted Jesus as my Savior. It was 17 years after Jesus accepted me that I learned what it meant to be accepted by my heavenly Father....to experience His life flowing with power through me. I had spent 99.9% of my Christian life working FOR God. In 1985 I surrendered to the ministry, moved my family to New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. Since that time I have served Palestine Baptist Church in Bogaloosa, Lousianna...Lakeside Baptist Church in Metarie, Lousianna...Emmanuel Baptist Church in Tuscaloosa, Alabama...First Baptist Church in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee...College Heights Baptist Church in Gadsden, Alabama and presently I am the Senior Pastor at First Baptist Church of Mableton, Georgia. In 1999 God showed me the truth. I learned what it meant for God to work THROUGH me. The following is my journal entry for November 3, 1999.
"This journal is full of entries where I have made commitments to start fresh. As a matter of fact just about a week ago I made the entry just before this one. As usual something filled the space and I did not keep my commitment to come in early and have my quiet time, etc.
I have been growing increasingly concerned about myself. Over and over I have felt like I was turning into my Daddy. (Note: My father committed suicide in 1991.) I have acted like him lately. I have experienced some of the things he experienced. I have felt as if I was headed for some kind of show down. Debbie even confronted me the other night with the reality that I have every symptom of someone who is clinically depressed. I did no want to hear that but the symptoms do no lie. The past few weeks have been some of the most miserable of my lifetime. I have been on edge, to the point of tears, weeping openly for hours, stressed out over things at church - even though if things got any better there I do not know what I would do - I even go so low that a couple of weeks ago (after a fight with Debbie and a few days of low living before hand) that I prayed that God would take me out of this world. I had been having thoughts of just driving away and never looking back. It is not that I do not love my family, it is just that at that time I was under the delusion from the devil that they would be better off without me. We were leading a conference in Prattville that weekend and my topic was - "How to Get Over Life in the Pits.? How appropriate that God would have me lead a conference about being in the pits. I certainly could give them first hand information about what it felt like to be there. I thought as I got up to lead the conference that I would die. As I began to lead the conference, something began to happen. God began to speak to me. I was leading the conference for me. The conference was based on Psalm 40:2 where David said that the Lord has lifted him from the miry clay, set his feet upon a rock and established his steps. Well the Lord did that for me and He pulled me up?but I knew that there had to be more to this. We returned home on Saturday and I began to try to get to the place where God would speak to me about what to preach on the next day. Nothing came. I am not surprised given my state of mind. The next morning I arrived at church at my usual Sunday morning time around 6:15 a.m. I sat in front of the computer and could barely pray. Nothing I looked at in the Word jumped off the page at me. Nothing was coming. I was supposed to preach about vision because we are in the midst of a stewardship campaign. I went through my files and decided to preach my sermon on commitment that I preached as a trial sermon at CHBC. It was decided. That is always such a relief. I could not get excited because it was not a fresh word from the Lord and I was feeling like I was slipping back into the miry clay again."
Pretty depressing, huh? Well, it was depressing then, but now when I look back on those days I can truly rejoice because of what God has done in my life. That night when it was so dark in my life something wonderful happened! I died to myself. I did not really know what had happened until I started reading Handbook to Happiness by Dr. Charles Solomon. I called my wife and said, "I am reading a new book and if it is true I will spend the rest of my life telling people about it.? It is true and I am happier and more fulfilled than I ever dreamed I could be.
I was the kind of pastor that wanted results. If I did not get the kind of results that I wanted, I blamed myself. I always assumed the answer was that God is not pleased with my preaching, leadership skills, or my abilities. My response was to make commitments to pray more, study more, visit more, plan more, and program more. I never kept those commitments because I too busy. The guilt was unbearable. I was burning the candle at both ends and I ran out of wax. Oh, I was getting results! Things could not have been any better in my ministry; but it was never enough for me. When I came to the end of myself and began to understand the truth of the crucified life - the resurrected life of Christ in me, I began to really "rest.? I am busier now than before, but full of passion for the ministry. The difference in me now unbelievable! I have learned what it means to live in Christ. I no longer feel guilty when throngs of people do not respond during our services. I have been set free from worry. My marriage is stronger. I have stronger relationships with my church family. I am more relaxed. I can have fun again! It is a great life?. HIS life!!!